inscript
Zenith /'zenI0/ noun. point of heavens directly overhead;
highest point (of power, prosperity, etc.).
welcome... do as you please..
this is now ok.. but still under some construction..
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[ The - Timeline ]
+February 2005+ +July 2006+ +September 2006+ +February 2007+
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
the last reason to make this last for as long as i could...
i wished her words were miracles. i wish her words were magic that would break the spell. the spell of being bound. the spell of being silent. the spell of being restricted. a curse perhaps. a spell i cast upon myself for the better of all. for the better. for her.
a curse i acquired the moment long long ago. the moment i stopped to believe. the moment i wished to run. the moment ran away. the second i fell apart. the second i regretted. the second i feared for the second time.
for the better. i ran. for the better i walked away. for fear i chose for the better. for fear i cowered away. for years i remained silent. for years i remain still. for years until now. what about now?
now the spell is lifted. now i can be free. now i can come out of hiding. now is too late. now has just passed. now will never be.
timing is of the essence. time. time gives life. time erases. time takes away pain. like it did hers. time prolongs the curse. time measures this burden. time reminds us of our faults. time reminds us of the time passed. the time wasted. the time accumulated doing nothing or doing the same thing.
time. we need more time. the last thing we need. the last thing we want. i don't need any more time. i need things to happen. and yet i need time for that to happen. the last reason will be kept in the shadows. maybe it will never be brought to life. the last person will be buried and might never be unearthed. for time i had.. time i lost.. time i still choose to waste.
why now? if never then? why now? the spell is still there. it wont go away. i just need more time but i don't want to want anymore.
when was that moment. just recently. just before she spoke. when were those moments? many already through the years. many gone to waste. many chosen to be thrown into the depths of my being never to be brought to life. never to be fulfilled never to be spoken of.
what agony is this. to feel but never to express. to rejoice but never to exalt. to falter but never to cry. to think but never to say. instead to carry on. to live in those moments. never expecting. only ever hoping. waiting.
the last reason is this. the last reason is worthless. i need time. i need time during those moments to make them go on forever.
+ [ tsinhEE ] n a n d 2 p a + Buwahahahaha!;) 11:07 PM
Saturday, September 09, 2006
an alternative post to the post of same date found in tsinhee
take off your mask once you get back home. .stare at that person in the mirror. ..close the lights. ...let your friends appear. ....lie down and think. ponder. reflect. dread. cringe. cower. crumble. .....but never let yourself cry.
put on your other mask .stare at your new face. ..repress the thoughts ...let your friends take care of it. ....lie down and close your eyes. dream. feel. fly. falter .....but never let yourself die.
from where do these enemies come from. from the depths of the heart. unwanted feelings. dreaded thoughts. come my friends it's time again. the pouring shall be plenty. your pathetic fool is once again ready.
i know not what i'm feeling. i know not what to do. i know not why im so troubled when i have no reason to. i know only that i feel empty i know only that i long i know only that i tremble behind a mask trying to be strong. i know that i am disturbed but the cause drives me tense i know that i am unwell but the reason makes no sense
i know i don't have answers and i'll just waste time if i try so i'll just bottle those thoughts inside and continue to fortify this only self that i know of, the only one everyone knows for i go about and secret and feed the rest to the shadows...
+ [ tsinhEE ] n a n d 2 p a + Buwahahahaha!;) 4:33 PM
Sunday, July 30, 2006
what picture is this that sees spatters of red everywhere? a scene of cause and effect a scheme laid out before me to unravel a crime perhaps a tragedy a picture i have yet to see...
what picture is this that feels so intense? a jolting nerve every step a vivid warmth blood's drop against the cold shower of rain a sensation i have yet to gain...
what picture is this that asks of intrigue a path of scarlet to be traced a dish with wine a restless soul a revelation i have yet to know
what picture is this you ask?
+ [ tsinhEE ] n a n d 2 p a + Buwahahahaha!;) 5:36 PM
Thursday, July 13, 2006
haha... now officially opening this to the world (as if it hasn't been before.. haha) okay.. i added a few things here and there... hmmn.. what else...
don't expect me to be updating this a lot since i barely have time as it is... only lucky there wasn't classes
ok.. wat to expect.. pics pics.. depending on my mood haha
poetry, writings.. don't expect too much of that... i'll mostly be doing my storytelling in the other blog so .. there
that's all peace!
+ [ tsinhEE ] n a n d 2 p a + Buwahahahaha!;) 5:31 PM
Monday, July 03, 2006
sorry this is still under major construction haha at least i set up a tagboard already
basically just transfered my poems from my other blog to here.. about the layout, i just saw it like this.. (probably done 2 years ago..by someone)
pati ung links ko ndi gumagana.. haha
ok.. so wait wait wait..
+ [ tsinhEE ] n a n d 2 p a + Buwahahahaha!;) 4:46 PM
tsinhee 06
you know you've felt it or at least you know the sad truth of the false accolade
you dont understand it or at least you doubt the sad fate of your false accolade
you know it's not right or at most you detest the injustice of our false accolade
you receive it from the judges or at least from your kin the momentary recognition of your false accolade
you find you're disillusioned or at least you're misled becuase of the illusions of our false accolade
you want to correct it or at least go the other way but you know you cant escape this world's false accolade
you then drown in your grief or at most you perish yourself then the masses show their pity for your wasted false accolade
+ [ tsinhEE ] n a n d 2 p a + Buwahahahaha!;) 3:29 PM
WrappEd in a storm of confusion, puzzlEd by wEary and doubt Waking to sEE just illusions, so I drEam to sEEk a way out.
Sail to thE dEpths of subconscious Discover advEnture within UnravEl a world found in mysElf JournEy whErE no onE has bEEn.
Finally, paradisE is found! contEnts are of hEart's dEsirEs Enjoying this sanctuary only I know. Utopia, sEEms not to ExpirE.
ThEn amidst thE comfort of luxury Cataclysm starts an uproar My hEavEn is swallowEd by TEmpEst! and I lay washEd up on thE shorE...
Slowly, rEcovEring from tumult, a dark figure forms nEar my land ThEn I sEE this daunting mirror of mE ordEr: "Sailor, it's timE you walk the plank!"
Just whEn I plungE into DarknEss I awakEn to light of rEality. Catching my breath, i realize then that, the most fEarful ExpEdition is in mE...
+ [ tsinhEE ] n a n d 2 p a + Buwahahahaha!;) 3:23 PM
Thursday, February 17, 2005
A thorn bEtwEEn thE shadows of your callousEd hEart A thorn to stop it's bEating, to tEar it apart An illusion, a silhouEttE a nothing no onE is who i am who you arE To mE..... to nonE A thorn bEtwEEn thE shadows... Do you havE a hEart? No nEEd to stop it's bEating it was long torn apart
+ [ tsinhEE ] n a n d 2 p a + Buwahahahaha!;) 4:27 PM
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